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The Lost and Found

The Lost and Found

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Madness or Incompetence

Published by communitypublishingabq@gmail.com on April 5, 2024 Respond

Reflections on the anniversary of the assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

The choice between madness or incompetence is not a new one. It seems that throughout human history, or at least US history, we have been confronted with this choice. After all, as I write this article, we are dragging our feet in choosing between helping Palestinian innocents (over 14,000 children murdered) while selling / giving tax payer paid for weapons to Israel. We recently had to choose between the healthcare industry profits (excluding providers – MD’s, Nurses etc.) and the wellbeing of our most vulnerable (elderly and at-risk) during the COVID pandemic, where we have lost over 1.15 million Americans. During WWII, we delayed in choosing whether to join the war against Germany, fully aware of the Holocaust against Jews, or remain neutral while over 6 million were being slaughtered by the Nazi’s.

Dr. King’s Legacy

The discussion of Dr. King’s assassination on the 56th anniversary of his murder related to madness or Incompetence begins with one of his landmark accomplishments: The Voting Rights Act of 1965.

Voting Rights Act of 1965

This act was signed into law on August 6, 1965, by President Lyndon Johnson. It outlawed the discriminatory voting practices adopted in many southern states after the Civil War, including literacy tests as a prerequisite to voting.

National Archives

Historically and unconstitutionally, impediments to voting had been established in conservative states that prevented many African Americans from voting. Thanks to Dr. King and other civil rights leaders, the Voting Rights Act of 1965 was passed and pushed away all those obstacles and finally allowed for close to full African American participation in our democracy.

The Regress of Progress

In 2022, a Center for Public Integrity investigation found unequal access to voting and political representation in all 50 states. Twenty-six states — all under Republican control — made access to voting less equal for people of color, younger voters, immigrants, people with disabilities and others following former President Donald Trump’s 2020 re-election defeat.

How could we let our country descend into madness? Who were the stewards that were charged with keeping the hard fought gains made by Dr. King and his generation of social justice champions? That’s where the incompetence comes in. Since the 1980s we have seen a two party sponsored corruption of our political system, allowing for unlimited $$$ campaign contributions via Super PAC’s and other dark money sources. Many of the perceived longtime stalwarts of the Democratic Party such as the Clintons, Nancy Pelosi, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, and Joe Biden (among others) did not launch efforts at Campaign Finance Reform. Towards the contrary, these folks colluded against campaign finance reform leaders such as Senator Bernie Sanders with is Get Money Out of Politics movement.

Unrepresented

Why you ask? Because there are large sums of money to be made by all by accepting multimillion contributions from the National Rifle Association, the health insurance companies, the Oil and Gas industry, “Big Pharma”, to mention just a few. Polls consistently show that, for example, most Americans support an assault weapons ban, most Americans support abortion rights, and most Americans support limiting the amount of money donated to political campaigns. In short, our representatives are no longer representing us. To be clear, the vast majority of our elected officials from both parties have their hand in the big money financial contribution pot. Due to this legalized bribery, our “representatives” have allowed for the initiatives that Dr. King fought and died for to be rolled back.

The solutions lie with us, the voting populace. We must demand that all elected officials be subject to campaign finance regulation, where candidates have an allotted amount of $$$, given out equally to those who meet a signature threshold. We will not see a healthy democracy restored until financial gain is not an incentive to run for political office. That has to be our litmus test for any candidate running to “represent” us be it locally or nationally.

Alex Paramo

Alex is the Founder of Community Publishing. Community Publishing is dedicated to creating virtual space for community based artists of all media (writers, painters, photographers, musicians, etc…) to collaborate on multimedia book projects with the purpose of promoting their work. Alex has authored two children’s books that were adapted for the Theater – Princess Marisol & the Moon Thieves and Princess Marisol & the Portal. Alex, with his daughter Marisol, will be releasing the third book in the Princess Marisol series, Princess Marisol Presents the Wisewoman & the Moon.

Alex also writes music review articles, and is the host of the film focused podcast smARTalk. Alex is a Social Studies teacher and serves on the Board of KUNM, a public radio station based out of Albuquerque New Mexico. Read his full bio here.

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In the Footsteps of Peace: Lost

Published by communitypublishingabq@gmail.com on October 23, 2020 Respond

Chris Brennan is a New Mexican Singer Songwriter with the Reggae-Rock group Revíva. He also is the Recruitment & Training Director at First Choice Community Healthcare. Additionally, Chris spent 4 years in the Peace Corp stationed in Nicaragua. Find previous articles in his In the Footsteps of Peace series here.

Northern New Mexico is one of the most beautiful parts of the Land of Enchantment. From the Mora Valley, to Taos and Tres Piedras, to Pecos and Chama, it offers some of the most stunning vistas the Southwest has to offer. Yet like most things that have such innate beauty, there is often a Catch 22 that comes along with this quality. For me, the allure of the wilderness and its splendor has a tendency to disarm me and make me forget just how dangerous it can be. Since I was young, I have loved to backpack, camp, and hike in the mountains like many New Mexicans. Over the years we have definitely had close encounters with bears, wolves, snakes, and all kinds of animals that may put a fright up your back. But nothing compares to the feeling of being utterly and hopelessly lost.

View from the Top

That was the story this past weekend as a trio of us navigated the vast Santa Fe National Forest tucked behind Manuelita Canyon. While I felt comforted knowing that we were with a longtime resident of the area and expert hiker, I grew concerned as she repeatedly let us know that she had previously gotten lost on this specific route. As that part of the forest badly needs to be serviced and cleaned, all of the fallen trees make it very difficult to orient one self. After hearing her say for the fourth time to just stay on the ridge if anything happens, I exclaimed, “Please stop! We’re not going anywhere without you.” As she is nearing her 78th birthday, the reality that she could slip and fall and leave us in a precarious position settled into the back of my mind. Luckily that didn’t happen. We found the top of the route with a beautiful view of the surrounding valleys and canyons. I started thinking about what I was going to make for breakfast upon our return and all the other tasks I would need to do before driving home.  

Sights Unseen

Ten minutes upon our descent, the first signs of something wrong began to creep up. Our pack of 5 dogs had lost the scent of the trail. The rocks we had put up along the way to help guide us back were nowhere in sight. Having gone through similar episodes before in my life, my emergency response went into full effect: Do we have enough water? What about cell phone battery? Who would know where we might be to help us? What are our options moving forward? After going through the checklist and remembering to breathe and stay calm, more philosophical questions start to arise. Why are we on this path right now when we knew it would be dangerous? What would I do differently if we do manage to find our way home? Who and what are the things that I am most grateful for and looking forward to doing again if I get the chance? Have I done enough to leave the world a better place if this is it for me? 

After 4.5 hours of backtracking and using our intuition, we were finally able to find the trail that led back to the car. A wave of pure elation and gratitude overwhelmed us. I was no longer worried what I would eat that day, but rather really excited to hear my parents’ voice over the phone. Getting home late and not being able to complete all my tasks no longer mattered at all. For just a brief time, I was fully present in the moment and experienced a state of true bliss to be alive. 

Cutting off Frivolous Chores

This story is not as harrowing as that of Aron Ralston, who managed to cut off his own arm in order to save himself from a boulder that had crushed him while canyoneering. Nor is it as inspiring as Las Vegas Raiders’ Tight End Darren Waller, who overcame being lost in substance abuse to get sober and become one of the best players in the league. Yet all stories of EED lost seem to end in a similar way. There are only two potential endings when you are lost: You somehow make it out and survive, or you perish. What happens frequently is that by getting lost, we often tend to find ourselves. By going through a difficult time, we reflect on whom and what is important to us and what time has been wasted on frivolous chores or relationships. When you are lost with other people, you learn that you have to trust and depend on another; to use the skills that each has to collectively survive and get back on track. We think about what we would do differently if given a second chance, and how we can use our time more wisely.

You would think that after going through this situation multiple times in my life, that I would have learned my lesson by now. I am always sure to have enough water. I have flashlights and knives and jackets to stay warm. I watch enough Bear Grylls to know which mushrooms are poisonous and which are edible. But the truth is that in getting lost, there is always an opportunity to reset. Getting lost gives you the chance to start anew, to enjoy the basic comforts of life.

Lost and Found

I share this story today because I look back and see a country in the United States that seems a bit lost right now. We are just beginning to see a second wave of a virus that has already been relentlessly detrimental to our physical and economic health as a nation. Once seen as the leader in global environmental action, we are the only developed nation to drop out of the Paris Agreement. We can’t seem to figure out how to support our law enforcement while also holding them accountable to protect all of our citizens equally. We no longer are the country that takes in refugees and supports them on their way to the American Dream. The upcoming election has many Americans both fearful and mistrustful of the voting process as well as the results and potential consequences. According to my group of friends living in Tokyo, Copenhagen, Florence, Melbourne, and Nicaragua, we have become the laughingstock of the international dinner table. We seem to have the lost our identity and pride as a nation. Some might say that we never had a positive identity and that the ugliness of our history and oppression is finally just coming to light. Others say that waving the flag simply means the right to free speech and unlimited arms. I believe, however, that this nation was once a symbol of progress for the human race. We have repeatedly stepped in throughout our history to assist other nations going through difficult times. We have also witnessed many Americans create, invent, write, and will into existence institutions and ideas that have without a doubt contributed to making this world a better place. There’s a reason that John Lennon moved to New York City and Elon Musk and Tesla have their headquarters here in the US. 

Hope in the Face of Uncertainty

Hardships often prepare people for an extra-ordinary destiny.

I don’t believe that one political candidate or party will save us and help us to find ourselves as a country. I also don’t need scientists or politicians to shape my view that the climate and environment are rapidly deteriorating, putting us in a dire situation as a human race. And I cannot pretend that I think we will resolve all of the social, racial, health, and economic challenges facing us as a country within the next ten years. As an optimist, however, I do have hope. Although we are lost right now in the woods of division, fear, and illness, we are starting to question: Where are we and who can help us? Where have we wasted precious time and resources? What would we do differently if we are given a second chance? It is only by losing one self that we can forge a new way ahead. The path will not be easy or straight ahead, but full of frightening and existential challenges. The good news is that we have some great people from all walks of life making changes in our communities. We have a new generation growing up fully knowing the perils of climate change and inequality that have tools at their disposal that no other generation in America had. Most importantly, we have each other. So now that we know we’re lost, we had better start learning to depend on each other to get through this. There are only two options when you’re lost, to survive or to perish. I hope we find a way to the former.

Reviva – Afghani Man

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Goyo on the Go: The Khmer Rouge

Published by communitypublishingabq@gmail.com on October 9, 2020 Respond

I didn’t know what to expect really, and after years of hearing about the nightmares of the Khmer Rouge and their emergence through Chinese support and funding by Communist, Marxism-Leninist international power brokers. Along with the above, the Viet Cong, Northern Vietnamese Army, was by 1960’s, gaining a foothold deep within the jungles with plans to overthrow the newly independent Cambodian government. To add to this mix, throw in the Khmer Republic, which was backed by the U.S. before The 1970 Cambodian coup d’etat of the Communist party under prime minister Pol Pot.

The Killing Fields

As my arrival time was approaching I couldn’t help thinking of the biographical drama film of the “The Killing Fields” based on real events when two British journalist covering the Vietnam War were apprehended by the Khmer Rouge and forced into labor camps and thus bore witness to the human genocide of Cambodian civilians. To help lighten my mood, the musicology enthusiast within myself focused on Cambodian culture. Cambodia won its independence from France during the 1950’s and therefore my muse was early 1960s French Cambodian Pop Music. Additionally early 1970’s Cambodian Rock and Roll, primarily influenced by U.S. Armed Forces Radio, caught my attention. My travels limited my stay only to SIam Reap and unfortunately I never made it to the capital Phnom Penh, the actual birth place of Cambodia French Pop music and 70’s Rock and Roll. Nevertheless once visiting, it is very hard to find any Rock and Roll in Siem Reap these modern times and to my dismay coming up short of any semblance of pre Communist culture of Cambodia.

Poking the Bear

During The Khmer Republic, pro U.S. era of the 1960’s, a lot of the musicians influenced by western culture adapted hippie fashion, music and lyrical content which was diversifying Cambodian culture poking fun sarcasms towards the conservative ultra hard right wing autocracy of the communist party. Much of this new wave influence spawned genres of music from Garage Rock, Psychedelic, Funk, Soul and even Proto-Punk. However, the Cambodian Civil War took its toll on the country and along with American bombing campaigns over areas of Cambodia bordering with Vietnam, made it difficult for musicians in Cambodia. Wartime curfews, often lead to musicians having to play day time amidst civil war bombings and gunfire nearby as the musicians performed. Somehow Cambodian Rock scene persevered through this until the fall of the Khmer Republic to the Khmer Communist Rouge of 1975.

To the Extremes

The Khmer Rouge was highly right wing autocratic, xenophobic, totalitarian repressive paranoid regime which called themselves the Democratic Kampuchea and their communist ideology was pivotal in the indoctrination of social re-engineering, re-classification policies such as farmers and peasant’s of National purity from province Kampuchea ethnicity you were considered no longer as working class. A strong majority of farmers were considered traitors to the Khmer Rouge Revolution or simply didn’t agree to new reform of agrarian society, specifically the rural agricultural co-operatives. These purges and rebellions not only took place in rural areas and villages but all Civil Class systems based on ethnic background suffered re social engineering including religion.

Declaring Atheism

Although a New Declaration State of Atheism was pronounced by the Khmer Rouge, it did not save lives of thousand Buddhist Monks whom faced large-scale secularization and iconoclasm. There was a destruction of 15,000 year mark of Cambodia temples, monasteries, scriptures and sculptures. This severity towards the Buddhist Monks resulted in hard labor but most commonly lead to their execution’s as fate towards Cambodia ethnic minority of the Islamic religion. The Khmer Rouge belief system was for radical transformation of self imposed economic isolation and Nationalize Country isolation from outside foreign influences, closing schools limited to re doctrinarian, abolishing Banking and all currency and even neologism, could you imagine forced to reform your language, sadly this is a type of colonialism.

Forced Patriotism

The strategy was about destruction of individualism and was forced by execution. Imagine as a farmer your life disrupted by sudden regime change imposing a vision of agrarian society of cooperative farming which translates to all your hard work is shared including your livestock and agriculture to the country regime with no banking commerce. To survive farmers were forced into slave labour and often just killed their own livestock. All civilians of class Musicians , Intellectuals, Chefs, Educators often executed or spared to force labor camps to these rural farming co operatives, if you wore glasses, it was, to the regime, a signal of intellectualism. It was common for a rock and roll musician whose life was spared, only to be sent to hard labour working camps and typically being forced to only perform National Patriotic Songs of the French Revolution era. Musicians had to decide to play songs that woefully went against their ideology but sure easier than working 10 to 15 hours days at labour camp with no end insight.

Modest Monastary

So you could foresee the voyage anticipation ran high and little uneasiness due to my sympathy for people but nevertheless was excited soon upon arrival found myself checking into my room at very modest charming hotel. very close to downtown Siam Reap that had all the charm and energy of a Buddhist Monastery. My first Night out i explored many streets ,vendors and bars where befriended some curious

Cambodian diaspora of Russians, Chinese and Vietnamese and of course others of the InterNational Community typically Australians, British and German’s. You can sense the life restored to the streets even though only been 23 years of Pol Pot death in which last few loyal commanders still surrounded him from his northern border province near Thailand. Although Cambodia was again Republic empire its international court trials still ongoing to persecute Khmer Rouge commanders of Pol Pot Regime of crimes against humanity evolving the genocides of many Vietnamese and Cambodian ethnic minority groups as of 2018 was last current ongoing sentencing of Pol Pots regime.

The Recovery

Cambodia has somewhat recovered economically and demographically from Khmer Rouge Regime however took until 2009 for Cambodia education system to be required the teaching of the Khmer Regime atrocities of genocides buy typically its been only by word of mouth from surviving elders. The genocide not only effected Cambodia intellectualism culture as well the Rock n Roll and Pop music of pre Rouge Regime bands such as Baksey Cham Krong regarded as Cambodia first guitar rock band influenced by American surf rock bands even though band broke up in 1966 and some of the members survived the genocide however still 20 members of its family died nevertheless Baksey Cham Krong band

influenced many bands that came after them. Band Drakkar influence of hippie fashion long hair aesthetic and hard rock sounds compared to Led Zeppelin, Jimi Hendrix, Santana and Grand Funk Railroad and their self titled debut album recorded pre Rouge Regime era sold 20,000 copies a decade later after the genocide ended making it the highest selling full length album of Cambodia at that time. However when the album was originally released Pol Pot Khmer Rouge was in early stages of the revolution overthrow and the band was amongst the 2 million of residents forced out of the Capitol City of Phnom Penh and forced to work camps but the bassist and lead guitarist disappeared during the ensuing of Khmer Rouge genocide as their fates are still unknown.

Imprisoned Music

Meanwhile the singer Touch Seang Tana was imprisoned in a work camp and sang Santana songs to Khmer Rouge Soldiers on demand while passing himself as of a common peasant and the Rhythm Guitarist Touch Chhatha was of many professional musicians who were sent to work camps and forced to play patriotic and traditional music for the Khmer Rouge troops practically everyday, subsequently the surviving members reunited for the fist time in 2011 for a show in Singapore. Other notable musicians whom disappeared without a trace and highly presumed executed is the King of Khmer Republic music Sinn Sisamouth a self taught musician at very early age and wide influence of composing traditional music of pop, psychedelic, Rock,Blues, Latin and cha cha cha. There are few accounts of his death and disappearance but one popular story is Sinn Sisamouth hand of fate was struck that he was ordered to be executed by khmer Rouge firing squad but requested one last opportunity to sing one last song to attempt an appeal to the soldiers emotions ,but the soldiers executed him anyhow and sadly many of his master recordings where destroyed.

Civils Times During War

During the Cambodian Civil War Sinn Sisamouth was a supporter of The Khmer Republic Military and had recorded patriotic songs in support of the Republic stance against Khmer Rouge insurgents. Another Singer Ros Serey Sothea she was regarded as “The Queen with a Golden Voice” National treasure and she recorded over hundred songs including great remake covers of Creedance Clearwater Revival and Sam the Sham of the pharaohs but many of her master recordings destroyed and because she was famous entertainer of western cultural influences qualities disdain by Khmer Rouge she was targeted immediately for imprisonment or execution even though few claims she was forced into marriage with the enemy and physically abused but any case her remains where never found as well.

Pen Ran another Female singer during the Khmer Republic before the Civil War she was regarded as the second lady of popular music culture in Cambodia and she had recorded over hundred original songs from risque songs of romance and sexuality and known for her unrestrained personality and rejecting traditions asked of Khmer women to more western influence of hairstyles and fashion representing more of modern gender roles. Really recommend you watch a film documentary ” Don’t think I’ve Forgotten: Cambodia Lost Rock and Roll for further insight to this lustrous history of music and cultural of Cambodia and thankfully in post Rouge Regime Government surviving musicians where allowed to find each other again and perform on national radio and create new content all the while the Black Market along with Cambodia music rock fans came together to reprint or remaster from copies of personal collections and reproduce whatever survived from the chaos dealt by the Khmer Rouge Regime.

Find more about Greg Hernandez, click here.

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In the Footsteps of Peace: Humility through Illness and Injury

Published by communitypublishingabq@gmail.com on July 21, 2020 Respond

At some point in our lives, most of us experience some kind of injury or illness that alters our outlook on life. These events often humble us and give us awareness of how grateful we are when we do have our health and livelihood. Whether it’s seeing someone close to us passing away, or feeling that something has been taken away from us, these events often teach us a lesson about changes we need to make either as an individual or community. 

For me, tearing my ACL just before the state tournament in basketball gave me some important life lessons. They often joked about the “Senior Curse” at St. Pius, in which the captains and stars of sports teams had season-ending injuries while trying to capture the crown. I had seen some of my fellow classmates in other sports have devastating injuries and end up in the hospital, but I never thought it could happen to me. Alas, that fateful day in Santa Fe while diving for a loose ball at half court, my knee was taken out and would never be the same. We had a great chance to win State that year, and although I was able to play a few more games with the team, I just was never the same player. Up to that point, basketball had been my whole life. I thought I would go to college and join the team there. I now had to reflect on what was really important, and ask some tough questions: How else could I spend my time outside of school? Will people still like me if I am not on a sports team? Was I training or doing things the wrong way and maybe could have prevented my injury?

I eventually learned to cope with my injury and found new and exciting things to do outside of basketball, like playing guitar and writing songs, volunteering for organizations, and making friends who were different from me in many ways. I guess it was something that I needed to be taught somehow. I needed to learn to be more humble and that things weren’t always going to go my way. As I saw several people close to me pass away from illness that year, I realized that bad things happened to good people, and that there was often no reason or rhyme to it. We can try to control everything around us, but sometimes just one stroke of bad luck or bad timing can change, or end, our lives. I had to learn to let go and to live more in the moment instead of meticulously planning for the future.

As Fragile as Life

I have been reflecting on this frequently lately as I see that continued surge of Covid-19 in our country and across the planet. From Russell Westbrook to Tom Hanks and Nick Cordero, famous athletes and celebrities have not been immune to the virus, despite having great medical care. Politicians like Boris Johnson, who laughed off the virus, have ended up fighting for their lives against it. Young people like the 30 year old man in Texas who died from the virus after attending a Covid party often think the illness is a hoax until it is too late. 

Neva Give Up

We still have a long fight ahead as a country and planet to help contain and survive this pandemic until there is a vaccine or treatment readily available (which is looking more optimistic by the day). In the meantime, I think there are some lessons we can learn from this tragic illness that has taken lives across the globe. First, I have observed how some countries’ people have put aside personal and political differences to come together for a common cause. The results speak for themselves, and I hope this is something the US population can learn from other nations. Second, maybe the way some of us were going about our lives before all of this could use some adjustments. I no longer need to waste gas driving to work when it is not needed. I also don’t miss singing at bars ‘til 2am as I get older, and my liver is definitely grateful for the change as well. I think many of us have changed for the better, and we need to keep these changes up as things return to the new normal. Third, this pandemic has forced us to evaluate who and what are most important in our lives.

Bosque trails lead to Family/Friends

Many of our circles have gotten smaller, and that is not necessarily a bad thing. I may not need to fly to Europe to be with a long-lost friend when I can take a walk in the Bosque with my family and friends who live here.

Finally, just as my injury taught me, there has never been a better time to live in the moment and not worry about the past or future. There are so many things that are outside of our control right now, and things will likely never be the way they were before. But we are at a crossroads in which we can change ourselves and work together to create a more peaceful and just society. If each of us can take a few minutes each day to show gratitude for our lives and those around us, we may emerge out of this illness as a smarter, kinder, and happier humanity. 

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Poetry Thursday: Shook Ones II

Published by communitypublishingabq@gmail.com on January 18, 2018 2

Onna Tuesday:
A Collection of Poems from Carlos Contreras and Hakim Bellamy

Poetry“The contents of this collection takes titles of popular Rap songs from the 80s forward and uses them as the titles of poems by Albuquerque’s Inaugural Poet Laureate, Hakim Bellamy and myself Carlos Contreras.

The connection, we were raised on these “war songs,” they became our battle cries, and from the throws of these trenches, we’ve created a reality for ourselves by continuing to use the voices given to us by those who came before us.”

Carlos Contreras – excerpt from Onna Tuesday.
To purchase and for more info click here.

Shook Ones II (1995) – Carlos Contreras

Today I found nowhere for it to go
that feeling in my chest
the one that wells up into eyes
the one that makes me short of breath
breathe.

I kept,
telling myself
breathe
I was short of breath…

heavy chest

lots of stress

bills
family
work
hustle
repeat
repeat after me,
breathe…

I kept telling myself to do just that –

It feels like
nobody would understand
I don’t want to feel “like that”

Like this –
this isn’t easy
never has been.

Anxiety has been my
friend or lack thereof
for quite some time now –
sometimes I wish we didn’t know
each other’s names.

Sometimes I can barely remember
my own
when it comes to visit
sits on my chest and refuses to say anything
explain itself
and I can’t explain why
I can’t breathe…
I kept telling myself.

it’s in moments like these
that I can’t seem to find words –

Go figure
a poet at a loss

I’ve lost a lot of time
feeling this way.

lost some weight
lost some peace
lost a piece of myself that now seems
replaced by the puzzling nature
of being out of breath
a natural reaction and action
of survival – and it’s all I am trying to do
sometimes, when it hits –
survive
breathe…

Think about how it will all be ok
about how it all doesn’t need
to get done today –
things and people and life
can wait –

As I wait –

Today,
I waited for 3 hours
to feel normal –

and that doesn’t in any way
make me feel normal.

I wonder what inside of me
has made this my… “normal.”

I fail and or give up
before starting on finding
answers to rhetorical questions that will only
make me feel worse about myself
while hoping I haven’t passed on
the worst of myself

To my daughter –
That she will learn to
approach life with a chest that doesn’t
feel like it’s a hundred pounds heavier
than necessary – when all the sun did was rise.

My eyes dart across the room
and look for anything that will
make it stop

My mind never does
my feet never do
my mouth rarely does
except when I find myself here –

Often alone
trying to not be a burden
trying to not be found out
finding myself
out of sorts
and off kilter – the kind of day that can go fuck itself
dying to be over and it’s only 10am –

And then
at some point in those days
in this kind of day
the tide
subsides
leaving me in my own wake
worn and weathered
a little wet under the eyes
a little sore in the chest
frustrated between the ears
but grateful to still be breathing.

It’s these things that make us who we
are,
the stronger for its
or in spite of its
the
confusion
worn like a badge of honor
displayed for anyone willing to see
to listen
to ask –

I am not ok some days
and that’s ok some days
because my some days
are some folks every day – I remind
myself and say,
just breathe…

*****

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PoetCarlos Contreras has been recognized as a national champion performance poet. He got his start in the area of competitive spoken word, or Slam Poetry. He is a Community Organizer, Community Engagement Strategist with ProgressNow and the Founder of Imma Star Productions which is dedicated to promoting Poetry, Journalism, Activism, and Humanism. He grew up and resides in Albuquerque, New Mexico. READ MORE

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Through the Looking Glass: Reciprocation

Published by communitypublishingabq@gmail.com on February 2, 2017 Respond

Reciprocation: Healing the rift & working TOGETHER by Chessa Peak

Reciprocation. To me this words means to work with. It is the delicate art of allowing and receiving with grace, integrity, and emotional maturity. It is delicate patience and speaking from the heart. It is accountability for your actions and allowing others to speak their truth without critical judgment. It is being comfortable enough to speak your mind graciously and having your words be received the Lost and Foundwith respect and nurturing. It is the turning of the earth and receiving precious harvest. It is to work with. Sometimes it is hard work and you must know when to cut your losses to preserve self and soul. It should never get to that point of damage.

Reciprocation, I believe, is possible through the genuine and purest of love. So, for me, how have I seen reciprocation come to fruition? Through working with parallels. Parallels in those I love and have made a necessity in my world. Build from likeness with infinite kindness. It will get easier with practice, like any learned skill, all things take exercise and discipline to gain that greater knowledge.

The Lost and FoundParallels

Listen for the parallel frequencies in your life, you will hear them. These parallel frequencies are the songs emitted in the universe that bind us to our truest, happiest, and lasting gifts. I hope this small insight finds you in the most receptive state of mind and you may put it to use. May we grow together. Stay positive. Light and love, Chessa Peak
Read more of my Mental Health series: The Lost and Found
*****
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Self Deception and self Actualization Chessa Peak has been in New Mexico since the age of 4 and is an honorary New Mexican. A bartender of over 10 years in the Duke City, musician, entrepreneur, and current student at CNM, Chessa is now currently working towards her own non-profit group that will support literacy, art and music programs for Albuquerque residents and her immediate community. Having come through a negative past, her writings deeply reflect the nature of her personal struggles in an attempt to help others overcome their personal battles.

We are proud to be a community partner and digital marketer at the Rail Yards Market and theMonte Vista Fire Station. Need help with your web presence and social media marketing? Click here to find out how we can help you!

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Railroad Underground #NoDAPL

Published by communitypublishingabq@gmail.com on November 23, 2016 Respond

Railroad Underground by Hakim Bellamy

This track was written in support of the Standing Rock Sioux and all other indigenous nations acting as water protectors on behalf of myself, my son and our ancestral affiliation to the Shoshone tribe.

Find the Audio Recording here

Prologue: There are over 2.5 Million miles of oil pipeline underneath our country, and you don’t own any of it. Pipelines were developed in the late 19th century to compete with railroads as a transport mechanism for crude oil. Not because pipelines were safer, “environmentalism” was never part of the profit motive of oil & gas, but because of one John D. Rockefeller. His Standard Oil empire was built on bulk delivery rates for oil that he could “deliver” based on his other hustle, the Railroad monopoly. Pipeline’s offered the most sacrosanct of American Values, competition, to rival oil prospectors. Pipeline pioneers’ chief motive then (and now) was cost. Small spills were both accepted and expected, as long as those Standing Rock Sioux No DAPLspills did not measurably impact the ability to maintain competitive production rates … they were simply a casualty of profit.

On May 28th, 1879, in western Pennsylvania … the first pipe dream became a reality. Back then oil producers were spilling an estimated 5,000 to 12,000 barrels of oil every day. This equates to roughly one Exxon Valdez (1986) disaster per month being spilled into the environment. As recent as 2013, the Wall Street Journal reported that a pipeline spill occurs at least once a day. Likely a low ball estimate since oil companies self-report those numbers, and are only required to report leaks and spills over a certain volume threshold. A new conversation has begun in recent years to revert back to railroad oil shipments. Though accidents are historically more common on railroads than pipelines, the average quantity of oil lost is much higher in pipeline incidents than on railroads…and since we can actually see those inevitable incidents…they do not go undetected for long periods of time … only to be discovered when our children turn up sick or dead.

As Christopher F. Jones from Zocalo Public Square says, simply put “the fact remains that there exists no such thing as a spill-proof pipeline.”

Railroad Underground (for #NoDAPL) – Hakim Bellamy

It’s telling.

I already knew
that you had no respect
for my Gods. But what you did not know is
that I had none
for yours.

That the things I worship
are cyclical…
like balance, nature and peace.

While the things you worship
are terminal…
like empire, war, and oil.

The sound of the word “pray”
is the difference between
something very profane
in our language…
and very profound
in yours.

Where “discovery”
is a contested word,
and “rights”
is as broken a promise
as the term “treaty.”

Even when you put “civil”
in front, you are a contradiction
in sheep’s clothing,
and we are dying
to comprehend your compulsion
to shove your pipe
into things that don’t belong to you.

Making it incredibly difficult
to swallow this Cannon Ball in the back of my heart,
North Dakota.

Who gave you the right!?…
to remove burial grounds by the bucket,
to exhume the sacred for personal gain,
to pretend that there are not people in these plots of dirt,
that this oil that swells your dick so hard
is nothing more than the extracted remains
of my great great ancestor’s fossils.

Fuel.

You cannot own
what wasn’t yours in the first place,
but that’s never stopped you from trying.

Never stopped you
from succeeding,
til now.

Yesterday,
on the 66th day
of this fast,
this fast from oppression
and occupation,
our late grandparents woke the Bison.

Tatanka,
and “Our Mother” marched them
clear through our camp
to the shores of our resistance
to remind us

and you

of the righteousness of our cause.
Of the endurance of our resolve,
of the truth.

We know,
the best way to preserve a lie
is to eliminate everyone who knows the truth,
who remembers your secrets
and reminds you of your sins.

We already knew
that we would be the retribution
for you not getting your Keystone XL.

That if you find something
that will make you rich
underneath our homeland
you will displace us…

march us single file,
to a state you do not care about
until we are inevitably
in the way again.

That that tank…
just beyond the perimeter of our camp
you know, the one with the bone crushing speakers,
only gets 3.5 miles per gallon.

That the United States Military is the single largest consumer of oil
in the world.

That WE. KNOW. WHY
you go to war. There
and here.

You are desperate
pointing firearms at us
but will not shoot…
Afraid even the blackout of news cameras
will capture the oil sands dripping from your fangs
Afraid this trench won’t be big enough
for the both of us…

Ungrateful
Because you and I both know
that our conviction
and disdain for this pipeline
is the only thing standing between you,
and your desire to use this equipment
to get a head start
on digging your own grave.

But it is not your insistence on violence
against this planet
and those of us who have inherited her,
we have been hurting now for quite some time
and you are nothing new.

It is not the offensive,
shade of sunglass that the empire wears
to hide the vacancy of compassion behind their eyes.

It is not the obvious differences,
the white wallpaper of power
homogenized all the way down to the chisel of chin
that cowers beneath riot gear polycarbon.

Nothing like the diasporic complexion of
reds, and blacks, and browns
that lock arms on this side of your
imminent domain.

But what is really insulting,
is your curious display of gratitude.

To us,
having saved what little bit ecosystem you have left
for you, despite yourself.

You, still unaware…
of your own worst enemy,
though your intention was only
to ever be ours.

You are welcome,
for these prayers
of renewable humanity.

A world in which we do not act
as though humans are made up of 60% petroleum
as opposed to water.

Where we seek sobriety
and stop flooding
our mother’s pipes
with poison…

Where the gas stations close their doors
and her veins
collapse.

Her train track marks
evaporate

All the blood money runs dry

And from now on
we never
spill a thing.

~
Epilogue: On April 2nd 2016,TransCanada’s Keystone 1 pipeline leaked 16,800 gallons of oil on a football field-sized plot (300 square foot) of farmland near Freeman, South Dakota. The spill would have likely been larger had the neighbor of farm owner Loren Schultz, not called to report a strange looking substance on Schultz’s property. Even with the “state of the art” leak-detection systems that taxpayers generally subsidize as an incentive to attract pipeline jobs to their state, 22% of spills nationwide are ultimately reported by the general public.

© Hakim Bellamy, October 30, 2016

Community Publishing has published Hakim Bellamy’s Samuel’s Story, a multimedia children’s story featuring the music of DJ Flo Fader and the illustrations of Melvin Mayes available in Print and Digital editions.

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Hakim Bellamy

Hakim Bellamy

Hakim Bellamy is Albuquerque’s Inaugural Poet Laureate. He is also a scholar, educator, musician, and poet. Community Publishing has published Hakim Bellamy’s Samuel’s Story, a multimedia children’s story featuring the music of DJ Flo Fader and the illustrations of Melvin Mayes available in Print and Digital editions.

Community Publishing brings local artists of all mediums together in creative collaborations for distribution as Multimedia Books while promoting literacy in our communities. We are proud to be a community partner and digital marketer at the Rail Yards Market and the Monte Vista Fire Station. Need help with your web presence and social media marketing? Click here to find out how we can help you!

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The Lost and Found: What You Really Want

Published by communitypublishingabq@gmail.com on July 25, 2016 Respond

What You Really Want by Chessa Peak

Part 1 in a 2 part series

Wbat you really wantI see soo many of my beautiful fellow man locked in their places of fixed resistance. From not wanting to move past an emotional wound, staying in a job they hate, back and forth relationships, to refusing to claim their own greatness and live as they’re intended to live life: happy. We give so much power to external forces that it just seems easier to just let go and choose to listen to ourselves and choose the path of happiness.

I understand the confusion of being locked in the cyclical repetition of negative and soul damning thoughts. It’s time to insist on better for yourself. STOP punishing yourself. You don’t have to live there… though I understand if you are locked there and my deepest condolences for your poor soul if you choose to stay, I love you anyways and my strength is with you. Choosing to be happy isn’t easy and requires a lot of soul shredding truth to get there.

What You Really WantSo, decisiveness. In order to make real steps towards what you want (which I believe is ultimately happiness), you have to be willing to be brutally honest with yourself. If you’re not practiced in this it’s like learning a new trade. It takes time, patience, and dedication to learning how to pay attention to you. Not all of us were born or raised into this way of thinking. Those fortunate enough to have it easier don’t understand the struggle and that’s ok. This is for YOU to understand.

Maybe you really want to travel rather than be in at 9 – 5 job. Maybe you daydream about being a musician or a deep sea diver? Maybe you can’t possibly be those things but you love it? Then move yourself in the direction of your happiness. Maybe what you REALLY want is the comfort of a nice home and air conditioning. – To Be Continued next Monday!

Read more of my Mental Health series: The Lost and Found
*****
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Self Deception and self Actualization Chessa Peak has been in New Mexico since the age of 4 and is an honorary New Mexican. A bartender of over 10 years in the Duke City, musician, entrepreneur, and current student at CNM, Chessa is now currently working towards her own non-profit group that will support literacy, art and music programs for Albuquerque residents and her immediate community. Having come through a negative past, her writings deeply reflect the nature of her personal struggles in an attempt to help others overcome their personal battles.

We are proud to be a community partner and digital marketer at the Rail Yards Market and theMonte Vista Fire Station. Need help with your web presence and social media marketing? Click here to find out how we can help you!

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The Lost and Found: The Nature of Truth and Deceit Today

Published by communitypublishingabq@gmail.com on May 17, 2016 Respond

The Nature of Truth and Deceit Today by Chessa Peak

It’s very difficult to be honest with people these days without receiving a reaction like you are attacking the other person. We are not encouraged to be honest with each other. I’ve found that speaking the truth, even kindly and mindful of not creating pain for the other person, is a difficult thing for people to do and receive.

Truth and Nature of Deceit So how does one speak with truth without making someone feel attacked? Speak from a place of truth about you, ie: rather than telling someone that their actions are wrong which makes the person feel like they are “bad”, tell the person that you are having a hard time with their behavior and it is causing you stress or anger or whatever negative emotion you may be experiencing.

By coming from a place that is authentically you, if the person you are confronting with the The true nature of Truth and Deceitdifficult truth has love for you they will not want to cause you pain or will do their best to correct their behavior. If we can’t be encouraged to speak the truth, no matter how difficult you feel it is to speak, then we are all contributing to the widespread culture of lies and deceit that so many of us see and despise. If you can’t receive the truth, no matter how kind or harsh it is, then what course of action is left?

How you react is a choice, stop reacting out of anger, PERIOD. Act and react in grace and kindness or not at all unless it’s critical. If you love someone enough to speak the truth to them, realize that it’s just as difficult to speak it and receive it. The only way to correct this behavior is to be the change you wish to see in your world. Brightest Blessings, Chessa Peak

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Self Deception and self Actualization Chessa Peak has been in New Mexico since the age of 4 and is an honorary New Mexican. A bartender of over 10 years in the Duke City, musician, entrepreneur, and current student at CNM, Chessa is now currently working towards her own non-profit group that will support literacy, art and music programs for Albuquerque residents and her immediate community. Having come through a negative past, her writings deeply reflect the nature of her personal struggles in an attempt to help others overcome their personal battles.

We are proud to be a community partner and digital marketer at the Rail Yards Market and theMonte Vista Fire Station. Need help with your web presence and social media marketing? Click here to find out how we can help you!

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The Lost and Found: Owning Your Delusions

Published by communitypublishingabq@gmail.com on January 7, 2016 Respond

Owning Your Delusions by Chessa Peak

I’ve been my own worst enemy. I’ve allowed my anger and resentment to poison my spirit and The Lost and Found: Own Your Delusionsrelationships. I’ve allowed myself to stay in situations that were not beneficial to my upward growth. I’ve allowed myself to perpetuate the victim mentality in my mind. I’ve knowingly enabled bad behavior in myself and others which kept us both in stasis. I’ve based logical conclusions on emotional fallacies. I’ve been blaming and accusatory. I know the hell I’ve been through is not entirely self-inflicted but in taking responsibility for my ill actions and seeing my part in my afflictive nature I am able to learn my lessons.

In the past I’ve forced myself to say I was over this or that. Truth is I just looked past it and kept truckin, never learning from my mistakes, always repeating them, and finding any way to justify my lack of whatever I perceived to be important(real or imagined). Finding any band aid that would cover up my wounds. All of these self-defeating patterns can be changed. Habit is conditioning and environment. If you are committed to living a better life you must be committed to changing yourself. Change is slow and gradual unless you have three things: enthusiasm, a sense of urgency, and a The Lost and Found: Own Your Delusionsufficient motivatior.

Look at where you are lacking in your life. What needs dusting off? What are you neglecting in yourself and your life? What are you focusing on in excess? What can you do to make yourself a better person? Perhaps you make too many excuses? Make a list of your short comings. Train yourself to recognize when you are doing them. Force yourself to slow down and pay attention to what you are feeling. Write it down and re-read your own words. I’m not saying I’m there. I still have a long way to go but I have a genuine want to change. It can be done. Teach yourself a better way. These are some of the promises I have made to myself:

  1. I will never put myself or another person through emotional turmoil.
  2. I will know when to graciously cut my losses to preserve my inner peace
  3. I will keep with kind, considerate and compassionate people
  4. I will not allow the bad behavior of others to destroy my inner peace
  5. I will try always to respond with love and positivity, if I can’t I must walk away and return with a calm attitude or know when to walk away for good.
  6. I will know how much of myself to give to others.
  7. I will respond to inner anger and frustration with tolerance and patience
  8. I will keep my negative emotional reactions to myself, this nature causes an unnecessary drain on those who love me.
  9. I will not expect that others will reciprocate my good nature
  10. I will maintain my integrity, ethics, grace and soul. I do this by listening to my instincts and not going against them or else all falls apart.  
  11. I must avoid contact with what I desire until my mind is tamed. I have no self-control.
  12. I will stay dedicated to being the woman others see me as
  13. I will keep a healthy distance from those whose nature is contradictory to mine.
  14. I will slowly place people in my life. I will learn about their nature before I let them in.
  15. If the people I love are not interested in growing with me I will not attack them for it, I will separate myself instead.
  16. I will not force a connection or closeness on another soul again, I have to save that energy for my upward growth
  17. I will never again keep in my life those who hold no honor for them self or me.
  18. I will base my decisions on my needs rather than my wants.
  19. I will always try to wear a smile on my face and consciously try to emit kindness
  20. I will keep with souls of similar frequency that nourish my spirit and distance myself from overly confused, blaming and averting souls. I naturally expel too much energy on saving the lost. This feelings should be meet with compassion and empathy only, then distance. Nothing more

If I don’t learn to stick to my guns on these things I will not make it and I want to die with that peace in my soul. This is my own personal list. I challenge you to define for yourself what you wish to become for yourself. I wish you strength and perseverance. Namaste

*****
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Self Deception and self Actualization Chessa Peak has been in New Mexico since the age of 4 and is an honorary New Mexican. A bartender of over 10 years in the Duke City, musician, entrepreneur, and current student at CNM, Chessa is now currently working towards her own non-profit group that will support literacy, art and music programs for Albuquerque residents and her immediate community. Having come through a negative past, her writings deeply reflect the nature of her personal struggles in an attempt to help others overcome their personal battles.

We are proud to be a community partner and digital marketer at the Rail Yards Market and theMonte Vista Fire Station. Need help with your web presence and social media marketing? Click here to find out how we can help you!

Community Publishing: From the Community For the Community

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